Does my life have a rewind button?

My blog has moved

2010-06-15T07:54:00.000-07:00

My blog has moved and I am working on an entire new look. Check it out.

Have you ever wondered what you have in common with a Victoria's Secret model? Perhaps more than you think. Check out my latest blog post -http://drshannonreece.wordpress.com/

Life at the airport.

2009-10-05T05:00:00.000-07:00

I have a love/hate relationship with flying - I love being able to cross half the country in a matter of hours rather than sitting in a car for a couple of long days; I hate needing to hurry up to get to the airport, and then sit waiting to board a plane to get moving once again. This probably explains one of the reasons why I don’t fly any more than I do.

As I write this, I am sitting at O’Hare airport a bit disappointed, having just heard that my flight will be delayed for two hours. Fortunately, I am being entertained by the lives that are unfolding around me with my faithful furry companion at my side. To my right are a couple traveling with their granddaughter. They must have done this before because they came prepared with a laptop, headphones and a Barbie movie to entertain the little girl while we all wait. If I get bored writing, I may find myself engrossed in the tale of the plastic perfect 10 and the three Musketeers.

Some other people have reading material, but the vast majority seem to simply be staring off into space, hoping that somehow that will alter the speed of time. The man directly across from me is actually twiddling his thumbs. I don’t know that I have ever witnessed someone doing this. It is somehow mesmerizing.

The most interesting cameo is an airport employee handling a situation with a lost wallet. The wallet was recovered, but the latest twist is the claim by the passenger that $150 is missing. I think the passenger is out the purported cash, as I can’t imagine how you would prove it was there. It kind of falls into the same Bermuda Triangle arena as “when a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, did it actually happen?”

Thank you for enduring my diatribe. It has helped me pass nearly 10 whole minutes! Perhaps I should take the lead of my dog and simply take a nap. The next time I write will be from sunny Florida once again. Until then...

Thank you for reading and be well.

Make way!

2009-10-02T05:00:00.000-07:00

The leaves falling from the trees is always the signal that new growth is just around the corner. In some climates Mother Nature can seem to take her time when winters are long, dark and cold. But the point is that we must shed what is no longer needed in preparation for something fresh and new.

What do you need to shed to allow more growth in your business, your relationship, your life? For me, I am finally unclenching my hands and allowing the last of the “what if’s,” “how’s” and “why’s” to drop away so that I can focus on the manifestation of my dreams. I have embraced a mindset of possibility. I will never know whether I will succeed or fail if I never try. I will never know the best ways to produce growth if I don’t roll up my sleeves and learn how to do it. I will never know vast levels of achievement in my business if I don’t embrace an attitude of “why not!” and jump in with both feet.

Take a moment today to dig deep and determine what thoughts, habits, relationships or beliefs might be holding you back from achieving your greatest potential. Now is the time. Take a lesson from the trees and shed all the things that are getting in the way of allowing new growth in your life.

Thanks for reading and be well.

Boning up on branding.

2009-09-24T05:00:00.000-07:00

I have spent the past day and a half studying the wisdom of branding expert, Rob Frankel. Some of you may ask, “What is so important about branding?” Everything! I recently realized the following - there is a vast ocean of coaches with whom I swim; even though the solutions I offer are dramatically different than the next business coach, unless I educate my potential clients, I will simply look like all the rest. That is where a brand strategy comes into play. The Frankel Prime Directive is as follows:

“Branding is not about getting your targets to choose you over your competition. Branding is about getting your prospects to see you as the only solution to their problem.” - From The Revenge of Brand X (see http://www.robfrankel.com)

As I have tried to wrap my brain around the best brand strategy for my growing business it is clear why there are experts, like Rob, with the experience to help. Trying to come up with your own branding concept is like trying to see how your bottom looks as you walk down the street in the new jeans you just bought. It would require you to step outside your own body to get that perspective. When you are so close to the company you have built, it is not a simple task to look at it objectively and put yourself in the shoes of your ideal client.

If you are wondering why your customers are not beating down the door, begging to work with you or buy your product you might want to take a close look at your brand strategy. If it’s not strong and consistent, and imbedded in the way your phones are answered all the way to product, service and delivery, you may need to make some adjustments. In today’s economy, where first impressions are crucial, don’t let money walk right off your web page or out your door because you have not distinctly positioned yourself as the only solution to your client’s problem. Hire the expert and relish the return on investment.

Thank you for reading and be well.

What a difference a week can make!

2009-09-21T05:00:00.000-07:00

Thank you again for your patience while I took some much needed time to focus on my business. The past week has been very productive and I have concluded that it is time to jump in with both feet. I think I have been trying too hard to avoid making any bad decisions about my business strategy, to the extent that I was paralyzing myself. I simply needed time to figure out the steps and the right order in which to implement them. I made it and am on track.

I will be bringing you along on this journey, so hold onto your seat and let’s go! Beginning this Wednesday, there will only be 100 days left until the end of 2009. I intend to make the most of that time and get more done than I have in years. I am grabbing hold of a personal challenge and you can too. What have you been wanting to accomplish but haven’t started? Do you want to lose some weight, pay off debt, start a business? It’s okay to think big, as long as you are committed to doing whatever it takes to get the job done. If you are ready to rock, take the next two days to write down your personal pledge.

I am committed to strongly positioning my business and earning a multiple five figure income in the next 100 days. Wow! Now it is out there in cyberspace, so I have no choice but to get it done. I can’t wait to cross over into 2010 and set my next personal challenge! Join me on this adventure and please share your challenge with me. We can be accountability partners.

I will be sharing my successes with you every few days as I go along and hope you will let me know how you are doing too. Thank you for reading and be well.

Thank you for reading!

2009-09-12T05:00:00.000-07:00

Today marks the 30th blog since I began blogging last month. To those who have been faithfully reading each day, I wish to say thank you! For those of you who have been sporadically reading, I still say thank you! If this is the first time you have checked out my blog, please take some time to read the archived messages and come back for new posts on Monday, September 21st.

If I have disappointed anyone for taking a break, I do apologize. I have really enjoyed writing to you each day, but am spending this next week working on my brand strategy. I just finished an hour long session with Branding Specialist, Rob Frankel, and have much to absorb, write and absorb some more. The result will be a much better and focused me for you!

Until the 21st....

Thank you for reading and be well.

It has been eight years...

2009-09-11T05:00:00.000-07:00

I remember that morning so clearly. I had just turned on the news and saw one of the towers at the World Trade Center on fire. Just moments later I watched in horror as a plane flew into the second tower. I quickly grabbed the phone to call my parents in Chicago and find out what was going on. The remainder of that awful day I sat stunned in front of my television trying to wrap my brain around how something like that could happen in our country. Terrorism against Americans overseas was and remains prevalent, but I think we had been living for too long with a bullet proof attitude that no one could ever pull off such a feat within our borders. Sadly, we were gravely mistaken.

Today, we remember all those innocents who lost their lives on September 11, 2001. My prayers go out to the families and friends of the victims, and those who tried to rescue them. I wish to thank all the men and women in our Armed Forces who continue to fight for our safety and freedom each day. This is something we should never take for granted because blood has been shed for each of us to live in peace. Remember today and every day to pray for God’s shield over our nation. As we continue to push Him out of every aspect of our lives we don’t deserve His protection from those who wish to destroy us. But for each day that passes without disaster I am thankful for His grace.

Thank you for reading and be well.

Do you ever wonder how you will die?

2009-09-10T05:00:00.000-07:00

This topic emerged today as I sat twice this afternoon in the back of cabs sailing at high speeds around the city of Chicago. Let me preface by stating that I really appreciate a speedy ride to my desired destination as much as the next person, but I am particularly fond of arriving in one piece.

I have been making a couple of trips each week to the city for the past month and a half. The peaceful train ride is my favorite part of the trek, during which I have been able to get a tremendous amount of work done. Instead of three hours wasted, I find the time to be incredibly productive. Perhaps it is the gentle chugging along that gets my mental juices flowing....Sorry, back to the cabbies.

The cab rides are a completely different experience. I love to get from point A to point B in expeditious fashion, but there have been a few moments when I nearly suggested that my driver lighten the lead load in his foot. Between the jet propelled excelerations and near vomit inducing sudden stops, I have had visions of my spinal chord snapping in two at the neck or of my face slamming into the plexiglass that separates me from the driver. I really can’t afford the amount of plastic surgery it would take to fix that kind of boo-boo.

The continuation of my life is not the only issue. Have you ever seen how close the drivers come to picking off the pedestrians in the crosswalks? I swear there must be a daily contest back at the dispatch for the driver who can successfully clip a person without drawing blood. I would love to know where most of the cab drivers get their behind the wheel instruction. Their lack of road etiquette reminds me of the elderly drivers in Florida. The excuses of the latter group includes poor eyesight, loss of coordination, and the general attitude of “I am too old to give a fig, so deal!” But that is an entirely different blog topic.

So the next time you are in a cab with one of the nation’s finest behind the wheel, I wish you God’s speed and a safe journey, if it is possible to achieve both.

Thanks for reading and be well.

Setting yourself up for success.

2009-09-09T05:00:00.000-07:00

I took some time last night to listen to a Tony Robbin’s interview with John Reese, the internet marketer who made a million dollars in one day. Fascinating story! One of the major keys to his success was his mindset. Wanting more from life was not enough. He had to solidly believe he was capable of hitting that mark.

In my own business, it is not enough for me to want to be highly successful and reach thousands. I have to nurture a solid image of that reality in my mind. My self-image must support my dreams in order for them to become my future.

Our success or failure is a self-fulfilling prophecy. According to Tony Robbins, the mindset is cyclical. Your image of self is the point from which you determine your potential. Your perceived potential drives you to a certain level of action. That level of action produces a result. And the result you experience reinforces your belief or self-image. So if you have a low self-image, you will perceive yourself to have limited potential, which will lead to low action, producing poor results. The results will stand to reaffirm your original belief, and so on. Limited thinking will produce limited success.

The power begins with your perception of self. What do you spend the majority of your time thinking about when it comes to your potential? Your thoughts create your words, and your words create your reality. You are in complete control of the future you will experience. If you can’t see it, talk openly about it, and embrace it with emotion it will not manifest in your life. So what do you really want your life to look like?

I challenge you to begin thinking about what it is you really want; become aware of whether your thoughts support this with certainty; if not, then begin the process of making your desire bigger than your limiting self beliefs. Be aware of the power you have to elicit change in your life. The image that emanates from deep within your soul will be the driving force in creating your future. Create with intention!

Thank you for reading and be well.

Farewell to summer.

2009-09-08T05:00:00.000-07:00

By the time Labor Day weekend rolls around most kids have returned to school, families have taken their final summer vacation, and in northern climates men are breathing a communal sigh of relief that the lawn mower will soon be stored for the winter. For many, this long weekend is the last big hurrah before we bid adieu to summer.

As you take a moment to nostalgically reflect on your warm weather escapades, how would you rate your summer? I have provided a scoring system below to make things simple:

1 = My summer was nothing special. I passed the time in my cubicle at work as I would any other time of the year. The highlight was trying the latest lunch options from Lean Cuisine.

2 = My summer was okay. I tried to start a backyard garden, but fell into a patch of poison oak. After two weeks of impersonating the Pink Panther, covered in calamine lotion, I rejoined the human race. I salvaged the summer by planning some weekend outings with friends and family, keeping my distance from all things leafy and green.

3 = My summer was good. I took a few long weekends from work and spent lots of quality time with family and friends. I expanded my horizons by signing up for a Hip Hop dance class. It probably would have been more fun if the mean age in the group was greater than ten. I have concluded that there might be better ways to recapture my youth.

4 = My summer was excellent! I took six weeks of much needed vacation time, got everything done on my adventure check-list, and became honorary spokesperson for Jose Cuervo. I even had time to get some projects done around the house. I never knew the satisfaction of a job well done before mastering the art of delegation from a pool floaty.

5 = My summer was off the charts, the best ever!!! I spent three months sailing around the Hawaiian islands. I blogged my adventures on the high seas and was offered a book deal when I got home. My advance was substantial, so I have decided to quit my job to repeat the experience. Who knew blogging could be so much fun!

If you could have done it better or know that you did it with flair, I would love to have you share your summer fun by leaving a comment below. Like any other time of the year, summertime is what you make it, and luckily do-overs come around once a year.

Thanks for reading and be well.

And I said, "Thank you," with a smile. (The Conclusion)

2009-09-07T05:00:00.000-07:00

I think that the mind can fast forward sometimes, when someone begins to tell you a story, as it tries to figure out the ending before it is presented. I probably could have woven a hundred different versions of what this man’s life was all about - his purpose on this earth. But there was something in the way that he spoke to me that kept my mind tightly focused on each and every word as his story unfolded.

Nearly two decades ago the man had been an Army Lt. in the Gulf War. He claimed that his greatest accomplishment was not in winning any battles, but in safely bringing all of his soldiers home to their families. Though the war had been short, his time overseas had taken its toll and he retired shortly after the conflict ended. His life’s passion was to be in the service of others, keeping them out of harms way. This man was a Guardian.

On September 11th, 2001 he assisted the rescue workers, fire fighters and police as they extricated people from the soot and rubble of the Twin Towers. The man’s voice cracked as he described the horror and sadness of that day. I could see the pain of loss in his face, though he did not personally know any who perished. While so many of us were frozen in front of our televisions in the aftermath of those awful days, he was at the epicenter making whatever difference one man could. This man was a Guardian.

For the past five years the man had been on the road. He moved from town to town as if blown by the wind. The only constant in his life seemed to be the people whose paths he crossed. They all needed to safely find their way and miraculously this man walked into their lives the moment they needed assistance in one form or another. He was the voice in the darkness for the young boy who had gotten lost in a maze of storm sewers. His hand was the one the old woman held tight to while the firemen cleared the tornado strewn debris of a church in which they had been trapped. His eyes were the first thing the drowning man had seen smiling over him after being rescued from a rip current. His strength was appreciated by the victims of hurricane Katrina whose house he helped rebuild one board at a time. This man was a Guardian.

I was no longer cold as I listened to his life. The compassion and service this man offered to complete strangers warmed me to the core. My heart, that had been so heavy just a short time before, was now lighter as I felt wrapped in a comforting sense of peace and renewed purpose. There had been so many times in my life when God knew just what I needed to bring a smile to my face, put a spring back into my step, or in this case, restore hope in my life. As if God were whispering to me through the story of this man’s life of service, my eyes were opened to the possibility that my layoff today cleared the way for something bigger in my life.

Now nine months later, as I reflect on the magic of that evening in the cold with the Guardian, I am so thankful that God placed him on my path. Had it not been for that encounter, I could have so easily sought a job similar to the one I had lost and stayed on a road that lacked purpose. Instead, I was challenged to be something more, contribute something greater and to serve others in the process. I chose a direction that allowed me to shine a light in the lives of those around me so that I, too, could be a guardian and help people safely find their way. I had never quite known what I would do with my life until that night when everything came into focus.

When the man finished his story, I realized that the time had come for him to move on. He had fulfilled his mission. I understood then what he meant when he said it had nothing to do with the windshield. It had everything to do with my heart and the seed of hope and change that was planted. I sat quietly with my thoughts as I drove him to the bus station that night. He never asked anything of me, but after the gift he had given by sharing his story I offered to buy his ticket. In his quiet way, he accepted my gratitude.

“Do you think I will ever see you again?” I asked, already knowing the answer in my heart.

“My work is done here,” he answered, and I accepted the blessing of his friendship for that evening.

“I don’t know that I will ever be able to explain the impact you have had on my life tonight and the ripple of change that has begun,” I started. “It has been an honor to meet you.”

The man smiled at me with those deep blue eyes and replied, “God is a Maestro when it comes to orchestrating our lives. I am humbled to be His servant.”

He gathered his pack, standing there with me one last time. With my eyes dancing for the first time in years, I shook his hand and I said, “Thank you!” with a smile.

Thank you for reading and be well.

And I said, "Thank you," with a smile. (Part 2)

2009-09-05T05:00:00.000-07:00

I assumed he was your typical homeless person and hoped he had a shelter to go to this evening for a warm meal and blanket. “Maybe I should offer him a few bucks,” I thought, “but he might just go use it on booze.” Again something pinged inside my heart as I listened to the judgmental thoughts that were running around my head. Shrugging it off, still pretty sure I had pegged this man, I confidently asked, “So you got a place to stay tonight? I can recommend a shelter a couple blocks from here.”

The man just smiled. “Thank you for your concern, but I am not homeless,” he answered quietly. And he didn’t say more.

“Oh, I just assumed because you...uhh...” I stammered.

“Most people do.”

I was getting colder by the minute, but just couldn’t squelch my curiosity about this man. “Do you live around here?” I probed.

“Nope. Just passing through,” he said simply.

Continuing my line of questioning I asked, “Do you clean people’s windshields often?”

“No. I only do it for those who really need it.”

“Do you mean for people whose windshields were as dirty as mine?” I asked, seeking clarification of his statement.

“It has nothing to do with the windshield,” the man answered.

I had to know, “Why did you feel the need to clean mine? You said you wanted me to clearly find my way tonight.”

“That’s right,” he said, “to help you find your way tonight.”

“But I don’t understand,” I responded, getting a bit exasperated by now, and not because of the cold.

The tall thin man took a long breath, and began to explain his purpose to me as we both stood beneath the lamppost in the bitter cold.

(To be continued Monday)

Thanks for reading and be well.

_________________________________________

If you have subscribed to the service FeedMyInbox (from my website home page) to receive this blog via daily email and would like to interact with me using the buttons I describe below, simply click on the Does my life have a rewind button OR the title of the blog at the top of your email and you will be redirected to the blog page.

I have added a Share button at the top of the page. Please forward this message to those you think might be inspired by it. My dream is to reach as many people as I can with thoughts to lift their spirits and bring a smile to their face.

Feel free to click on the Comment link below or http://tinyurl.com/mahvkn and let me know your thoughts. I appreciate your feedback!

I invite you to subscribe to my blog by clicking on the Follow link above.

If you would like to receive daily posts via email through the service http://www.FeedMyInbox.com direct to your Inbox simply visit my website http://www.ALifeOutsideTheBox.com and sign up today.

And I said, "Thank you," with a smile.

2009-09-04T05:00:00.000-07:00

It had been a very long day at the office, one I would just as soon forget. I knew times were tough, but I wasn’t expecting to lose my job. The reality that I would be facing the unemployment ranks in the morning was still sinking in. “Why,” I wondered, “does life have to be so unfair sometimes?”

The bitter wind took my breath away as I headed for my car. A bout of wet snow the past several days had caked my car in a combination of dried muck and road salt. “I’ll get it washed this weekend,” I thought, “but right now I just want to get home.” As I hurried across the parking lot in the growing darkness, avoiding the occasional patch of ice, I noticed a figure in the distance who seemed to be crouched over the hood of my car. “What the heck?!” I muttered as I picked up my pace to investigate this unwelcome surprise. As I approached, I watched the tall thin man turn to face me.

My first instinct was to take a defensive posture in case this stranger dared to confront me. But my aggressive stance melted the moment the light of the overhead lamppost illuminated his face. Before me was not a man with ill intent, but a man with the most peaceful, friendly blue eyes, that seemed to burn a hole right through to my heart.

“Hello,” he said. “Rather cold out tonight.”

“Yes,” was all I replied, still entranced by something I saw in his face. There was a story behind those blue pools that danced in the light. His face was well worn, probably from years of exposure to sun and wind. He was dressed in layers of tattered, but clean old clothes, barely enough to fight off the cold for even a short period of time. Beside him was his pack. I guessed it contained the sum of his possessions. And in his hands he held a rag and a spray bottle with a remnant of blue liquid.

“Thought your windshield needed a bit of cleaning,” he said, interrupting my thoughts, “so you could clearly find your way tonight.”

“Uh, thanks,” I managed, while thinking, if he only knew.

“Rough day?” he asked.

“You could say that,” I answered, wondering if I had given something away in my face. But even as the words came out I felt a twinge of guilt thinking that my life was hard compared to his. What did I have to complain about? Sure I had lost my job today, but at least I had a warm place to lay my head tonight. What about this man?

(To be continued tomorrow)

Thank you for reading and be well.

________________________________________________________

To eliminate any confusion:

Feel free to click on the Comment link below or http://tinyurl.com/mahvkn and let me know your thoughts. I appreciate your feedback!

I invite you to subscribe to my blog by clicking on the Follow link above.

The inherent purpose of the middle child.

2009-09-03T05:00:00.000-07:00

I have another reader to thank for today’s post on the middle child. We seem to share the desire to care for our parents in their elderly years. Please allow me to preface this tongue and cheek post by stating that I will be honored to care for my parents someday, as they have so beautifully, graciously and generously cared for me (and still are). Having gotten that out of the way, let me say that the middle child is the backup plan in the family. I will explain what I mean by that.

There seems to be an inherent purpose, or survival instinct among propagating parents to have three or more children. This strategic planning provides long term care protection in the event of worst-case scenarios. The oldest child can often be a controlling, Type-A personality, who, if left to his or her own devices might end up incapacitated with hypertension from a fast, stress-filled lifestyle. Therefore parents may have to count the oldest child out of the potential care giver role. Next, you have the youngest child. Many parents refer to the baby of the family as the wild child, free spirit, or blaze-your-own-trail type. In this worst-case scenario, the youngest may have joined a commune in the desert or moved to Botswana to teach orphans to read. So perhaps parents shouldn’t rely on the baby of the family. The only logical solution is to have at least three children to produce a middle child, a.k.a., the backup kid.

The middle child is the safe bet, as he/she is usually the easy going type. They are hard-working but not too serious or too wild. Like the story of Goldilock’s and the Three Bears, the appropriate choice for future caregiver is the middle child, who is just right. In my family, my parents created a backup for the backup by having four children. They like to plan ahead and have successfully covered all their bases. Truth be told, they will probably be sorry one day for having so many of us, as we will all want to be there for them in every way they need and may possibly drive them crazy with all the attention. So if you are a parent and planning for your long term care, be sure to have your backup kid in position just in case.

Thank you for reading and be well.

_________________________________________________

To eliminate any confusion:

Feel free to click on the Comment link below or http://www.tinyurl.com/yourcomments and let me know your thoughts. I appreciate your feedback!

I invite you to subscribe to my blog by clicking on the Follow link above.

Moving on after the big shove-off.

2009-09-02T05:00:00.000-07:00

Today’s topic comes from a reader who wrote, "I would love to see your ideas on layoff's and how people are coping;” and are things “really getting better?" First of all, let me say thank you for the comment and inspiration for this post.

Being laid off is not the type of experience you hope to have in your career. It is not something they prepare you for in school. When it was my turn in April, it initially felt as though someone had pulled the rug out from under me. I had waves of emotion ranging from complete shock and anger, to relief and excitement about the prospect of starting something new.

Things are tough and may very well get worse in the coming months. How you process and move through the experience is all a matter of perspective. There are people around the country struggling to make ends meet while attempting to find steady employment. Some will turn inward and shut down because of fear, rejection, anger and hopelessness. Those who can tap into their emotional reserves to be resilient and find the courage to think outside the box will be the ones who ride out the storm and find new direction.

If you or someone you know has been laid off, here are some coping strategies to help create a mindset for successfully navigating the transition:

Reflect on your work experience and find the value in it. Make a list of all the skills you acquired, contributions you made and special projects you spearheaded. You want to go into an interview in a position of strength, confident about all you have to offer a prospective employer that sets you apart from your competition.
Make a list of all the contacts with whom you had great business relationships. Start networking with them. Having worked with you, they have the ability to offer endorsements that might get you in the right door, or land you the position you have always wanted. Every article I’ve read on finding a job in this market talks about the importance of networking, networking and more networking. The friend of a friend might know of the perfect opportunity that you otherwise would never have found.
Don’t waste time wallowing in perceived misfortune. Invest in your mind, heart, body and spirit to reenergize, refocus, learn something new, and begin thinking about all the possibilities before you. No one but you can limit your potential.
If you have an entrepreneurial spirit and have always wanted to own a business, there is no better time than the present. The economic climate and growing unemployment crisis is causing people to rethink their future and find creative ways to carve out their own niche. Consult with your friends, mentors and family to see if this might be the right fit for you.

I am blazing my own entrepreneurial trail and am loving every minute of it! But each person must do what their gut is calling them to do. Your life is what you make it, so don’t let anyone sell you a different story. We are not defined by our circumstances, so create the future that you have always wanted. Instead of a layoff being a tragedy, it could be your greatest opportunity for change. “Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain.” - so put on your dancing shoes and join me!

Thank you for reading and be well.

_________________________________________________________________________

To eliminate any confusion:

If you have subscribed to the service FeedMyInbox (from my website home page) to receive this blog via daily email and would like to interact with me using the buttons I describe below, simply click on the Does my life have a rewind button OR the title of the blog at the top of your email and you will be redirected to the blog page.

Feel free to click on the Comment link below or http://www.tinyurl.com/yourcomments and let me know your thoughts. I appreciate your feedback!

I invite you to subscribe to my blog by clicking on the Follow link above.

If you would like to receive daily posts via email through the service http://www.FeedMyInbox.com direct to your Inbox simply visit my website http://www.ALifeOutsideTheBox.com and sign up today.

The importance of friends.

2009-09-01T05:00:00.000-07:00

In my experience, really special friends are a rare blessing in life. There are so many different levels of friendships, but the deepest and closest ones are the most cherished and enduring. People are continually coming in and out of our lives. Each one touches us and we are forever changed. Through every encounter, whether brief or lengthy, good or bad, we grow just a bit more and have something new to offer those whose lives we touch.

When I met my best friend several years ago, from the first moment it felt like I had found my long lost sibling. My life has been so much richer through knowing and loving my soul sister. My only sadness is that we live hundreds of miles apart. But when I connect with her, I feel as though we were never separated.

There are others in my life, some new and some old, with whom I have shared an instant connection. They are held near and dear to my heart. These are the friendships worth fighting for. But to use the analogy of a gardener tending to her beautiful flowers, she must water and nurture and regularly care for them. Friendships work the same way. If we allow ourselves to get wrapped up in the busyness of life, neglecting those we care about, we will begin to drift apart and the friendship will wither. It happens ever so slowly in the beginning, but if left unattended, we are carried apart as if caught in a rip current.

If there are people from your past with whom you long to reconnect, have the courage to reach out to them today. Life is brief and there might not be a tomorrow you can afford to wait on. Treat your friends like the precious gifts they are and appreciate the richness each one brings to your life. You would not be who are today if you had not touched each other’s lives yesterday.

I have added a Share button at the top of the page. Please forward this message to those you think might be inspired by it. My dream is to reach as many people as I can with thoughts to lift their spirits and bring a smile to their face.

Feel free to click on the Comment link at the end of this message and let me know your thoughts. I appreciate your feedback! I invite you to subscribe to my blog by clicking on the Follow link above. If you would like to receive daily posts via email direct to your Inbox simply visit my website http://www.ALifeOutsideTheBox.com and sign up today.

Thank you for reading and be well.

The breakdown before the breakthrough

2009-08-31T05:00:00.000-07:00

Lately, I have been feeling like a hamster running full speed on a wheel while getting nowhere. Agitation and frustration were two of the emotions I have been dealing with for the past few weeks. I am working hard to build my business, but in many ways have felt stuck. Having always known deep down that my purpose is to help others, not pinpointing the specific group I am to work with has been difficult. But today I experienced a much needed breakdown in order to achieve a breakthrough.

As I articulated my frustration to the great sounding boards, who are my parents, the mere release of pent up emotional energy through the shedding of some tears was tremendous. I was finally able to embrace the niche my heart has been longing for me to reach, while letting go of who I thought I was supposed to work with based on my background and other factors. Trying to focus my heart and energy in the wrong direction was not bringing me a sense of resonance or peace. I knew something was wrong with moving in that direction, but for some reason it was terribly difficult to let go of it. When that breakthrough came to me this afternoon, a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders.

My internal compass was having trouble finding north, but is now back on track. As I look back over the past few months it seems as though God was whispering directions to me. I am not always good at attending to His soft voice or quieting myself enough to hear it. Many times I prayed for direction and a clear answer. God answered those prayers by laying out the hints before me. He knows that I learn best by putting all the pieces of the puzzle together before I can see the big picture.

Is there an area of your life where you feel stuck and perhaps need to release your grip of control to find peace and freedom? When we feel restless in our spirit it is because there is something important we need to pay attention to. It may be something to walk away from, or something to walk toward. The key is in the letting go and opening of your hands to be lead onto the right path in your life.

If you like what you read, please feel free to click on the Comment link at the end of this message and let me know. I appreciate your feedback! If you would like to receive this blog via email direct to your Inbox simply visit my website at http://www.ALifeOutsideTheBox.com and sign up today.

Thank you for reading and be well.

Do you bruise easily?

2009-08-29T05:00:00.000-07:00

Recently I was listening to a song on my iPod by Natasha Bendingfield and it struck a chord in me. I was left asking myself the question, “Do I bruise easily?” I am a strong, independent woman destined for greatness! Why would this song cause me to even question that?!

Then I stopped to realize that we are all human and have feelings that run deeply. So it is natural that we might feel a bit “bruised” by a harsh word, a difficult situation, or broken heart. Given the right combination of circumstances I might bruise easily too. But my resiliency does not allow that “hurt” to leave a permanent mark, just a whisper of a memory. I can accept that of myself.

As the song says, for every person who has the potential to hurt you if you let them, there is another who has the capacity to bring positive healing to your life. When I think about the power each of us has to easily impact those around us with our words, actions, or a simple look, I realize that we need to be careful how we choose to use this power. Do you want to be someone who touches others in love or someone who destroys everything in your path? You get to choose, so choose wisely.

Thank you for reading and be well.

My inner child came out to play.

2009-08-28T05:00:00.000-07:00

Though most people probably would not admit it, we all have an inner child. Mine likes to come out to play when I am not providing regular outlets for self-expression in my life. Having been stifled for too long, my inner child usually comes out by way of a moderately bold statement. Most recently I asked my colorist to add bright pink accents to my hair. I must say it caused a bit of a commotion, but it was great fun while it lasted! I almost couldn’t contain my excitement sitting at the salon, waiting to see the final product. When my hair was done, I wished I had gone even bolder!

I am not the only person who breaks out of her shell periodically. I am sure it will happen again in the not too distant future. I never select a form of expression that is too off the wall or permanent, for the need to “burst out” is a temporary and fun release of energy. Some of my other adventures in expression include:

Henna tattoos;
Navy blue nail polish;
Having my hair cut off into a flat top;
Donning a dog collar; and
Partying with Jamie Foxx.

Perhaps I was too shy when I was younger, and have more courage to be me as an adult. All I can say, is that my life is an ever evolving adventure. Nothing I have done has been a danger to me or anyone else, which is vitally important. It has been fun to leave people guessing about the many sides of me. I encourage you to live your life like you mean it each day, and never get so stuck in a rut that you lose what makes you feel completely alive. I would love to hear about some of your adventurous moments, so please be bold enough to share!

Thank you for reading and be well.

Happiness is a habit.

2009-08-27T05:00:00.000-07:00

When life begins to feel a bit overwhelming, I take some quiet time to think about the things that bring me happiness. If you haven’t seen the movie Pursuit of Happyness starring Will Smith, please make the time. It has a wonderful message about taking personal responsibility for happiness that will resonate deeply.

Happiness is about maintaining a mindset that never allows your life to run you over. Happiness is an attitude. Happiness is a way of life. Happiness is a choice. Happiness is a habit everyone needs to create on a daily basis to live with riches.

Happiness is not an elusive vapor that is hard to catch. There are so many little things in a day that bring a smile to your face, elicit a chuckle or release the stress in a moment like letting air out of a balloon. If you attempt to disagree with my assertion, I challenge you to spend a day documenting the moments that caused even the smallest positive emotional response. I think you might be surprised at how long your list is. To get you thinking in the right direction, I have included ten things that have made me happy today - keep in mind that my day is still young.

The sound of the rain outside gently waking me this morning.
My dog’s kisses during our morning snuggle.
A witty email from a friend.
The nice man sharing the elevator who said “Hello” with a smile.
A warm pumpkin muffin from the Corner Bakery.
The punctual Metra train system getting me where I needed to go.
Being under the care of a skilled physician.
The fresh smell in the air after the rain today.
Peace and quiet to write.
The comfort in knowing that my God is with me every moment of every day.

I hope this has inspired you to cherish the unexpected sprinkling of precious moments that occur serendipitously throughout each day. You may find out that your life is so much better than you thought it was simply by taking notice. Always remember that “Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.”

Thank you for reading and be well.

Follow the yellow brick road.

2009-08-26T05:00:00.000-07:00

Do you think the Wizard of Oz would have been nearly as popular if Dorothy had taken the advice of the Good Witch and followed the yellow brick road? Imagine the story line, “And so Dorothy followed the yellow brick road and nothing happened. The end.” The book would have wrapped up after about twenty pages and most people would be using it as a cure for insomnia. Instead the author had the good sense to depict Dorothy as a curious, normal young woman who wasn’t necessarily keen on following the path of someone else’s design. Dorothy was a trailblazer.

Are you trailblazer? Or do you prefer to do exactly what others tell you to do. I suppose if you don’t have any desire for adventure, the safe and predictable path is the way to go. But how boring! More importantly, you should have the courage to direct the course of your life. Regardless of what you may have been conditioned to think, you are your best advisor when it comes to making decisions about your path. Sounding boards are great, but their role is to bounce your ideas around, not impose theirs on you.

Be prudent when accepting the advice of others. Take the time to evaluate whether or not their suggestions resonate with your deepest desires. That small voice that speaks from your core can be your greatest guide if you are able and willing to listen. Unfortunately, it can easily get blocked out by the noise of the world around us and all the conflicting messages that come our way.

What is your ideal life? Create the picture in your head and include as many details as you can. Are you living your ideal or is your life something vastly different? What is it worth to you to make the necessary shifts in mindset and move toward your ideal? I am here to tell you that anything is possible if you have a belief and burning desire to achieve something specific that is in line with your deepest purpose. Be a trailblazer in your own life and discover the adventures awaiting you off the yellow brick road.

Thank you for reading and be well.

The perfect pair of shoes.

2009-08-25T05:42:00.000-07:00

Ladies, have you ever spent hours, days, weeks searching for the perfect pair of shoes? I don’t think the male species will ever understand the thrill of the hunt that is encoded in our DNA. Whether you have an important occasion, or just found the cutest dress for $20 on the clearance rack, the finishing touch is always the perfect pair of shoes.

The problem I face is that I invariably spotted the perfect foot accessory three months ago and just walked on by. I can recall the moment perfectly. I can almost smell the leather. But that won’t make the shoes suddenly appear in my closet. Pretending it’s your birthday at Chili’s just to make a wish on a candle doesn’t help - I have tried. So I am stuck with an image in my head of the perfect pair of shoes that I can’t seem to shake. Talk about frustrating!

The trick to building a wardrobe is planning ahead and making sure all your bases are covered no matter what the occasion. That often requires purchasing a pair of cute shoes today for no particular reason other than their potential to create a Red Carpet moment in the future. And this type of shopping philosophy requires storage.

Amelda made it chic for the successful woman to have a closet for her shoes that is large enough to house a family of four. Don’t get me started on the space requirements for any other necessary accoutrements required by today’s Fashionista. Most men have given up the fight for closet space when sharing a home with a modern woman. If he gets the broom closet he is usually content, unless you are co-habitating with a metro-sexual. Heaven help you if you ended up with one of them!

Instead of denying the impulses of your natural instinct to forage for shoes, embrace them and let the hunt begin. Your kids really won’t mind sharing a bedroom and you can knock out a wall here or there. Problem solved. Don’t sweat the current economic climate. Beautiful, cute, sassy and elegant shoes can be found for a fraction of the price if your hunt leads you to sale sections, discount stores, resale shops and trendy boutiques wishing to clear merchandise. You may even get your hands on a coveted pair of Manolo Blahniks without breaking the bank. It can be an adventure in savings. For the men reading this blog who were wondering, the answer is yes! This applies to handbags too.

If you like what you read, please feel free to click on the Comment link at the end of this message and let me know. I appreciate your feedback! You can also visit my website at www.ALifeOutsideTheBox.com and sign up to receive this blog directly to your email Inbox.

Thank you for reading and be well.

Two Halves Do Not Make A Whole

2009-08-24T06:39:00.000-07:00

My feeling has always been that the saying, “two halves make a whole” is backwards when it comes to relationships. In that equation one plus one does not equal two. This concept has been romanticized in movies like “Jerry Maguire” with the famous line, “You complete me!” Sweet? Yes, but the character played by Tom Cruise was not a good example of a man who was presenting his best to his beloved. Holding yourself together with duct tape and a shoe string is not very attractive.

Why would you want to take on the responsibility of completing someone else? It is not our job to carry others through this life. This is not to say that you leave someone in the dirt who needs your help. But the best relationships, the ones that survive the rough patches, are the ones with two strong, healthy people at the helm.

I cannot expect a standard from someone else that I don’t represent myself, therefore I strive to be emotionally, financially, intellectually and physically at my best. Emotionally, I am regularly seeking and applying information on how I can be a better partner in life. Financially, I believe it is important to be debt-free. Intellectually, I grow everyday as a student in my business and life. And physically, I strive to stay strong and fit through exercise, mindset and nutrition.

I am certainly not perfect. Everyone has baggage - but I like to think that my baggage has wheels. So ask yourself today if you are regularly examining and refining yourself in an effort to be the best partner, parent, friend or family member you can be. If not, what are you waiting for? It is easy to expect a lot from those around us, but more important to expect the best from yourself.

If you like what you read, please post a comment below. I appreciate your feedback! If you would like to follow this blog, simply sign up by clicking on the Follow button at the top of the screen. You can also visit my website at www.ALifeOutsideTheBox.com and sign up to receive this blog directly to your email Inbox.

Thank you for reading and be well.

Superbly Single

2009-08-22T06:46:00.000-07:00

I’ve never been the type of woman who needed to be a relationship to feel complete. As I mentioned before, my life did not turn out exactly like I had envisioned it as a child, but who cares?! My life is great! Being single and forty-something is right where I need to be. It is truly liberating! I love feeling emotionally strong and independent, intensely focused and completely exhilarated by my work.

Being alone is not a precursor for loneliness. Never do I feel at a loss for companionship with my network of fabulous friends, and the close relationships I have with my family members - not to mention the company of my furry, four-legged child, Mia. My life feels complete.

As a single woman I have so many opportunities for personal and professional growth. My goals are clearly defined and there are no compromises to be made as I move toward the fulfillment of my dreams. There is no one I must consult before making decisions, and no one to hold me back other than myself. My strength and independence will make me a much better partner in business and life.

I am not opposed to being in a relationship with someone special someday. It is my desire to find my soul mate. But it’s not something that I will ever chase after. I leave that in God’s hands and timing, as I am only interested in His best for my life. In the meantime, I expect that He has much for me to accomplish in my season of singleness. So I embrace this time, blaze my own trail and hopefully inspire other single women to follow suit. By working on developing myself intellectually, emotionally, spiritually and physically, when someday comes along I will be bringing my very best to the partnership and expect nothing less from my one true love.

If you like what you read, please post a comment below. If you are reading my blog daily I invite you to become an official “Follower” by using the Follow button above.

Thanks for reading and be well.

The First Amendment

2009-08-21T04:00:00.000-07:00

I am ashamed to admit that I did not know specifically what the First Amendment states until I looked it up today. For your reference, I have copied it here. "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

The news has been inundated with stories about battles over freedom. There are brave men and women fighting overseas for our freedom to live. Battles are raging in our schools over our freedom to pray. There are battles erupting in town hall meetings over our freedom to select our own healthcare and express our concerns. And most recently, in response to John Mackey’s proposal of an alternative healthcare reform plan, a group has decided to call for a boycott of Whole Foods. None of these violate our First Amendment rights, and yet the press, some elected officials and organizations like the ACLU are crying “Foul!” against any opinion that differs from theirs.

You may wonder why I am writing about this topic - I am confused about why the Constitution is not being upheld to protect those for whom it was written - the people of the United States of America. Arresting someone for praying, no matter when or where, violates First Amendment rights. According to what is written, a person is not to be prohibited from the exercise of religion. Voters should not be called hate-mongers, Nazis, and right-wing extremists for standing up for their right to choose and state their concerns to their elected officials over a bill that could dramatically impact their quality of life. Those who choose to boycott Whole Foods have every right to shop elsewhere, but John Mackey did nothing to deserve this action by presenting his thoughts on the proposed healthcare bill.

A document written to govern all cannot be twisted to impose mandates on some. I find this very perplexing. Why have a constitutional right if it only applies to a select few? My purpose is not to make a political statement with this post. I just wonder how far we will allow our freedoms to be limited before we, as a nation, stand up and shout, “Enough is enough!”

Thank you for allowing me the freedom to stand on my soapbox for a moment. If you like what you read and wish to leave a comment, please scroll to the bottom of the post and use the comment box. I would love the feedback.

Thanks for reading and be well.

When God pushes you out of your comfort zone.

2009-08-20T04:00:00.000-07:00

I lost my full-time job back in the Spring. Even though I had been planning to transition from that position to working with performance clients in a private practice, I was going to do it on my time table. Life is not always that clean cut.

The layoff came as a bit of a surprise, but from the first moment, I knew it was a blessing. I found myself in a position where I had no more excuses holding me back. I launched full speed into setting up the structure for running a private practice and have not looked back. Has it been easy? No. I have had to get creative with my finances and rely on my family for many forms of support to keep the fulfillment of this dream alive. I am so fortunate to have the complete backing of my family and dearest friends. They are my priceless and biggest fans.

Deep down I knew the time was coming when God would push me out of my comfort zone. I was not pursuing my dreams because I had become complacent with a steady paycheck, benefits and a routine. I know I was placed on this earth for a bigger purpose and simply had to get past the fear of change. God answered my prayers, turned my life upside down, and placed me on a path in the direction of His will. I couldn’t be happier!

There is no room for doubt and I am living with a “no excuses” attitude. It is clear that there is nothing I can’t accomplish on this path. I have held tight for many years to Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." My future is unfolding according to God’s will and the most exciting part is the anticipation of all the ways He will work through me to touch the lives of others in a powerful way.

Have you become complacent in your life? Do you feel the time coming when you will be pushed from your comfort zone to a place of growth? Embrace the challenge for change! I feel like an eaglet who has been pushed from the nest. Now is my time to fly!

***If you like what I wrote, please take a moment to submit a comment below. I appreciate the feedback which will only help me improve. If you have a topic you would like me to write about, let me know and I will do my best to accommodate.

Thanks for reading and be well.

Christmas in August

2009-08-18T21:03:00.000-07:00

It’s that time of year when we begin thinking about hot cocoa with marshmallows, walking through the snow, decking the halls and gifts under the tree. WHAT?! It’s only August! But once again the stores are zooming past the end of summer sales, Fall. Halloween and even Thanksgiving to launch the Christmas season. It never ceases to amaze me to be walking through a store in August, wearing shorts and a t-shirt, checking out the latest in tree ornamentation.

Well, today this ever so sneaky marketing strategy sucked me in. It must be my weakness when it comes to the combination of subliminal messages, twinkling lights and shiny tinsel. In a matter of six hours I managed to knock out about 80% of my Christmas and winter birthday gifts. Bing, bang, boom! I even bought gift wrapping accouterments, so everything is neatly bagged, boxed, tissued and adorned, waiting to be shipped. It has been a busy and productive day!

Please don’t get the wrong impression that my shopping habits have much of anything to do with planning ahead or being extremely organized. I just love to buy gifts! It’s really that simple. Christmas is my favorite time of the year, so why not try to make it last for four months?! If you add the after-Christmas sales, you can stretch it to five. What a way to spend nearly half the year! Do I hear an Amen?

I have a fabulous partner in crime who taught me everything I know - thanks, Mom! When we hit February, we usually take a break for a while. But about the time the kids head back to school be on the lookout for the signs. It won’t be long before you catch a whiff of evergreen and see a Santa at every turn. My motto is, “If you can’t beat them, join them.” Frankly, it’s a heck of a lot more fun! So, Merry Christmas in August!

****This message was paid for by the Merchants of America, who would like to thank you in advance for your patronage this pre-holiday, holiday and post-holiday season. They asked me to remind you to buy often and buy big!**** My advice is to buy on sale and look like you spent a wad. After all, it’s the thought that counts.

Thanks for reading and be well.

ADOS

2009-08-18T04:00:00.000-07:00

As I mentioned in a prior post, I am great at coming up with fabulous ideas. That is the fun part. Seeing the fulfillment of my ideas through to the end is where I sometimes get stuck. I am a creative at heart, and often become bored with the projects I start that don’t come easily for me or move along quickly enough. I guess you could say that I get distracted by other things that grab my attention.

Recently I heard this problem referred to as ADOS. Very similar to ADHD, ADOS is Attention Deficit...Oh shiny! This has also been called Shiny Object Syndrome. I don’t think there are any support groups or medication for this yet. If I get a vote, I think Flintstone’s vitamins should be the treatment of choice. And if not a viable cure, they sure taste good and are a source of vitamin C, which never hurt anyone.

The dilemma I face is being able to maintain a strict and narrow focus on one project at a time. For someone who is known for being a bona fide multi-tasker, this is a challenge moment by moment. Even in composing this post I am thinking about the next five topics I want to write instead of steadily completing this one. This change in mindset from a juggler to a sharp shooter might take me a day or two to master. The point I am trying to make is that the key to success at any level is efficiency of time and energy, and that comes from working on one thing at a time. So get off the merry-go-round of life that tells us we need to be everything to everyone at every moment, take a deep breath and just work on one thing until it's done.

Thanks for reading and be well.

Love is a decision.

2009-08-17T04:00:00.000-07:00

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Real love, right love can be all of those things when a person makes love a daily decision. It is not a matter of how you feel about someone on any given day. Love is looking beyond ourselves. We make the conscious decision whether to love our spouse, our child, our parent, our friend, our enemy every day.

Over the years I have learned how to navigate romantic relationships. I like to think that I am getting better and better all the time, but know that I have stumbled badly a time or two or three... I think some of the greatest lessons I have learned have come out of my failed marriage. Yes, my ex cheated and bailed, but it takes two to make a marriage and two to break one. I share equally in that responsibility.

Again the desire for a rewind button arises. If only I knew then what I have come to know now about myself and the ways that I let my husband down in our relationship. Things might have turned out differently. This November I will have been divorced six years, and there are still moments when another layer is peeled back on the experience and it almost feels fresh again. Am I healed from the heartache and pain? Yes. Am I still learning how to love each day? Yes. Will I ever head down the aisle again? God willing, yes. But next time there will be much less focus on me, much more on we, and the decision to love daily no matter what.

Will you make love a decision today?

My thanks for this topic goes out to Dr. F. - a man of great wisdom and insight.

Riding the Train

2009-08-15T06:27:00.000-07:00

While visiting my parents in the Chicago area I have been riding the Metra train to get to the city and back several days a week. Rather than traveling with the highway herd at the amazing average speed of 35 MPH, I would rather ride with the smart people on a great mode of public transportation and spend my time writing for you.

Does anyone ever simply ride the train for the sheer joy of the ride and the rich opportunity to people watch? Do you ever watch someone and make up a story about his/her life? Okay, maybe I am the only one who lets her imagination wander to that extent, but trust me, it can be an interesting way to pass the time. Okay, I digress...

As I sit here again, I am left pondering the life analogy of riding a train with all these kinsmen-strangers each day. Where are they going and what will they be doing when they get there? Do each of us have a solid plan of action in place for our “ride” in this life? Or are most of us on the fly-by-the-seat-of-our-pants plan.

I have definitely lived in the latter category and can attest to the fact that the feeling of going nowhere fast is disconcerting. You can generally get away with this carefree approach to life when you are in high school and college, but as we get older our final destination and stops along the way become much more important. It is not just about the “where” you want your life to go, but the “how” of getting there.

Do you have a plan for the fulfillment of your dreams? And if you have a plan, do you know how you to make those dreams a reality? Developing a master strategy can be the easy part for someone like me. I don’t tend to have trouble coming up with great ideas. The implementation is the tricky part. So you might be asking yourself, “What does she do?”

I wake up each morning and decide how I will attack my day in such a way that I am supporting my dream with the right attitude and focus.
I work on creating a series of easily attainable, yet challenging mini goals that keep me moving in the direction of my dream on a daily basis.
I regularly assess my progress and make adjustments as needed to refocus if I have begun to drift.
I pray for wisdom. I pray for guidance. I pray for God’s will to be done in my life so that He might be able to work through me to benefit others.

When you awake tomorrow, how will you decide to move in the direction of your dreams? If you don’t know what your dreams are, then I challenge you to spend quiet time each day working to discover what is most important to you and what will make your heart sing.

Thanks for reading and be well.

The Queen of Procrastination relinquishes her throne.

2009-08-14T09:07:00.000-07:00

Ahhh..to be efficient with my time. A life-long dream for someone like me who has spent her life on the procrastination highway. But something happened as I traversed from my third decade to my fourth. Was it some sort of internal alarm, genetically set by my parents’ genes? If that is true, I am sure they have been wondering if my clock was in desperate need of a new battery. Frankly, I think as I have aged I have become less tolerant of adding unnecessary stress to my life.

If I had a rewind button I would love to go back and recapture the months of time wasted while I procrastinated about one thing or another. Think about what I could have accomplished if I had applied myself more diligently every moment of my life! I could have been the one to invent velcro! Okay maybe not velcro, but something great. Since I can’t go back, I must push forward and there is no time like the present to apply oneself to making the world a much better place.

Although I do work very well under pressure, when my genius is pushed out at warp speed, it can be a very draining process requiring a nap. The more things I get done in advance, the more peaceful my life. The more peaceful my life, the healthier I am. The healthier I am, the more things I can get done. So everything people have been telling me for years (and when I say people, I am referring to my wonderful mom) makes some sense after all. It just took me forty plus years to figure it out. I am smart, really. It just sometimes takes a while for all that brilliance to get processed with everything else going on in my head.

Today, I am the world’s greatest list maker. I don’t always check things off in order, but eventually I get it all done (and when I say eventually, I mean sometime before I die). I am working to be all about simplifying, streamlining and systematizing my life so I can experience greater balance and tranquility. My “home” work the past year has been to organize everything from closets and drawers to the bulletin board in my home office, so that home feels more like a sanctuary where my creativity can flow. Has the procrastination fairy been your best friend? If so, you might be ready to drop kick her to the curb to make room for bigger and better things. Take it from me, you won’t miss her too much and you will welcome the space to breathe a little easier each day.

Thanks for reading and be well.

My Top 10 List

2009-08-13T19:53:00.001-07:00

If I really had a rewind button, what would be better than going back to relive my Top 10 childhood memories?! A rewind button would not only allow do-overs, but do-agains too. My wonderful parents have been hard at work transferring all of the family photos and movies to DVD as a surprise for the family. We recently all got together to preview some of the old footage. A flood of great memories returned for each of us as we watched our lives unfold on the screen.

The common theme in what we saw was the joy of being together as a family to share special and ordinary moments. It is so easy for us to get caught up in the busyness of our daily lives, and our days pass from one to another like a blur. I try to stop and smell as many roses as I can because I don't want to miss the precious little things that make life so incredibly rich. I would like to formally thank my mom and dad for creating such a valuable tribute to our family. In a effort to get you thinking about your Top 10 list I have shared mine below.

10. Playing board games.

Do families even do this anymore? My family would spend hours playing Rummy or a full fledged game of Monopoly. I just loved that quality time together when we were engaged with each other, rather than being zoned out in front of a T.V.

9. Building snow forts in the yard.

My nieces and nephews must think my family is telling tall tales when we talk about how much snow we used to get during Chicago winters when I was young. Generally, there would be about four feet on the ground that would pack down so nicely for building forts. It was probably pretty cold, but I just remember that we had a lot of fun playing in all that white stuff!

8. Riding around in a P.P.V.

My best friend, Shari, had a contraption called a P.P.V. - People Powered Vehicle. Basically, it was about the size of a small car made of fiberglass that two people powered with pedals. We would pack a lunch or a snack, bring along some popcorn for the ducks and pedal around the neighborhood together. We felt so grown up "driving" as adolescents.

7. Horseback riding at my grandmother's ranch.

My grandmother owned a cattle ranch in Oklahoma when I was young where I learned to ride a horse named Canasta. I recently saw an old movie reel of me on Canasta and I must have been only about six years old. After a long ride we would head back to the double wide for some ice-cold watermelon. That was the first time I ever ate watermelon with salt on it.

6. Winning a bronze medal.

I was a competitive figure skater when I was young. At age twelve, I attended my first qualifying competition which was called Upper Great Lakes. My coach was not focused on me to be a medal contender, so there was absolutely no pressure. I had such a great time! I won the figures portion of the competition and placed third overall after the freestyle event. I still have the bronze medal hanging in my home office.

5. My mom's homemade bread.

My mom used to make bread from scratch. Frankly, when we were growing up, she made everything from scratch and it was all good! But her homemade bread was a special treat. The aroma would fill the house, leaving our mouths watering in anticipation. The best part was getting a slice when it had just come out of the oven and spreading it with warm butter and honey. Mmmmm...

4. Grease Lightning.

Who can forget the song "Grease Lightning" from the movie, Grease. That was one song that my sisters and I really loved. Some of our favorite times together were creating dance numbers to songs like this. We would spend what seemed like days choreographing our number and then present it to an audience of two, namely mom and dad. I can only imagine how silly we must have looked but for those few moments in the spotlight, we felt like stars!

3. Snow skiing.

I learned to downhill ski when I was quite young. My parents would take us out west to the beautiful Colorado Rockies. What fun we had skiing as a family! The main goal was making it through the day without wiping out under the chair lift for all to see. I had my fair share of major face plants, but the best ones were when you left a trail of ski equipment, goggles, hat and anything else that might have fallen off as you tumbled down the mountain.

2. Tubing with dad.

My dad loves his toys! One of his favorites was our ski boat. He had a game to see how many times he could skip a rider across the water after dislodging him or her from the inner tube he was pulling behind the boat. We would hold on for dear life, trying not to swallow lake water as we laughed, and my dad would create massive waves driving in circles and pull us over them. I don't remember what the record was for number of skips, but he generally would achieve a minimum of 3-4 at a time. I have never ridden a mechanical bull, but imagine the experience would be similar.

1. Laughing!

The one thing my family always does when we get together is laugh. My youngest sister and I have a knack for getting everyone going. We tend to avoid public places because we can create quite a stir that embarrasses my mom to no end. I am never quite sure how it begins, but we always end up with stitches in our sides and tears rolling down our faces. They say that laughter is the best medicine and our family loves to laugh together.

Well, that is my list of very sweet memories. I hope you will have fun brushing aside the cobwebs from your memories and remembering special times with your family.

Until next time, thanks for reading and be well.

Is your life everything you thought it would be?

2009-08-12T19:31:00.000-07:00

As a little girl I had dreams of marriage and children and the home with the white picket fence in suburbia. Amazing how dreams shift over the years! It would be great to have those things, but my life was designed for something else. So when many my age might be feeling like they are approaching the halfway point, my life is just beginning and I would not trade that for a second. Instead of children, my clients are the ones I nurture and watch fly. No matter what form it takes, there is nothing more fulfilling than helping someone reach their potential, discover their greatest joy, or embrace all of who God created them to be.

It is strange to look back over my life and be thankful for all the really tough times that brought me here and made me the strong, independent woman I am today. To encourage me, my mom would often quote the verse from Joel 2:25 where God says, “I will repay you for the years that the locusts have eaten...” It is a promise that I held tight to during my struggles and I have been watching it unfold before my eyes. Where some might be heavily laden with regret about the past, I am dancing in the light of my present circumstances.

I listened to an interview this evening with Anne McKevitt who turned hardship into making things happen in her own life. She said that it often takes failure to bring about success. I agree! How else would we learn anything of value? We are the only ones who have the power to make change, and create the things that we want in life. According to one guru, if you don’t do it, it won’t get done. My advice to you is to take what you have learned from the tough times and determine how that can be used today so you can get out there and start living your life like you mean it. Let go of the dreams about how you thought your life would be, and embrace exactly where you are! You will be amazed how liberating and motivating that can be.

Thanks for reading and be well!

A Consequence - is it a good or bad thing?

2009-08-11T18:57:00.000-07:00

Wikipedia defines a consequence as "a resulting effect arising from another action...It is used to indicate that all human actions have profound effects."

Does a consequence always have to be indicative of a poor decision that lead to a bad result? The old saying, "You made your bed, now you have to lie in it" has rung in my head a time or two. But it suggests embracing an attitude of defeat, and acceptance. Such an attitude will get you nowhere fast.

Though my past is speckled with poor decisions, many made rashly, without consideration of the "what if's," my life has not imploded to date. Sure, hindsight is 20/20, but life without a rewind button means that we must choose to make the best of the situations in which we find ourselves. So where does that leave me...

I am currently dealing with a potentially reoccurring vocal chord disease that has no known cure, that I may or may not have been able to avoid. I will never know where it came from or if I was born with it. But that is not important now. This consequence is producing a God-given strength and hope in me that I did not know I could experience. My prayers are being answered daily and I am confident that there will be good that comes out of this season of life I am traversing. I desire to make the most of each day and to continue to move swiftly toward my goals to positively impact the lives of others through my work and writing. It is not about what I can't do, but what I am able to do each day. I am learning to be thankful for all the little things that a busy life can cause us to take for granted. Hindsight is great, but present sight through a clearer perspective is so much richer.

Consequences don't always have to be bad things. If that were true, there would be so many precious lessons that were missed along the way of life. I intend to make sure that my "human actions" will create profoundly positive effects on the world as often as possible. Is there an area in your life where you could turn a consequence into something that will make a positive difference for someone else?

Thanks for reading and be well!

How did I get here?

2009-08-10T20:38:00.000-07:00

Like the song says, "It's been a long road, gettin' from there to here...", but here I am, ready or not. My life has been sprinkled with ups and downs, rough and smooth waters just like anyone else's. But I think what speaks most eloquently to our character is how we navigate the tumultuous times.

In looking back over my past 40 plus years, there are places where I wish a rewind button really existed. I have made many mistakes and reaped the consequences of those choices. We all do. I am certain that I have many more mistakes to make before my time here is done. I love to say that what doesn't kill me, makes me stronger. And I have to say that I am far stronger today than I was even five years ago.

Once again I find myself in a season full of challenge, which is why I have chosen to write my thoughts here. It is my hope that this blog will not selfishly be a place of catharsis for me, but a place of inspiration for those who read it. Age, errors and rocky roads have taught me that I don't have the strength to go this course alone. Every life has a purpose. Through every experience, whether joyful or painful, God prepares us for something bigger than ourselves. I carry that understanding into each day which makes it so much easier to climb the next hill. I could spend my time anxious about the unknown future, but knowing that I am protected by my Heavenly Father brings me peace and joy about what my future holds in His hands.

Someone brought Psalms 91 to my attention about a year ago. It is such an easy Bible passage to remember when you need to feel safe - Psalms "911." The first two verses are so comforting, and for that reason I wanted to share them with you tonight.

"He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High, will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, 'He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.'"

Until next time, be well.